Really, New Moon PR People? Really?!?

So my wonderful husband had to run to the store the other night and knowing that I'm secretly a 14 y/o girl an avid reader, he brought me back a copy of this week's Life & Style magazine with this cover (we're each allowed one age-inappropriate celebrity crush, and mine is currently RPattz...his is Emmy Rossum, but he gets extra bonus points for saying it's because she looks like me even though that is not true. At all):

Secretly being a 14 y/o girl Concerned about the cast's emotional welfare, I perused the article. It turns out that the film's publicity coordinator a rogue crew member sent out a press release revealed off-the-record that Edward Robert Pattinson is jealous of Jacob and Bella's whatever actor plays Jacob and Kristen Stewart's burgeoning relationship. And of all the cute new werewolves. And it turns out that when he sweats, it doesn't in fact turn into sparkles but rather b.o. like the rest of us.

So help me, if they send out a press release that my age-inappropriate celebrity crush is in an accident while filming his death-by-sparkle scene and Kristen Stewart has to rush to his side, heads will roll. Roll. Of course, now I've given them the idea.